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How to Face Your Fears and Other Obstacles with Darin Sargent

In this episode, we're joined by motivational powerhouse Darin Sargent, author of "Battle the Beast - Defeating the Lions that Oppose Your Destiny." Born with just one hand, Darin's journey embodies overcoming adversity and living beyond limitations. As he shares the inspiration behind his latest book, Darin draws parallels between David's biblical encounters with lions and the modern-day challenges individuals face. Highlighting common "lions" like fear, doubt, and failure, he delves into the importance of spiritual and emotional growth, the impact of relationships on overcoming hurdles, and practical strategies for conquering personal obstacles. This conversation will equip and encourage listeners to face their "lions" and pursue their God-given destiny with courage and determination.

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We have a choice. We can sit back and just let life pass us by, or we can face the things that are trying to oppose our destiny. And just just exist or we can persist and we can be the person that God is wanting us to be calling this to be, and I learned early on. I'm not going to sit on the sidelines. Welcome to the Christian leader made simple podcast.

I really hope this episode helps you learn and master the skills you need to grow your leadership effectiveness and enjoyment. Be sure to hit the subscribe button to get notified as soon as I post a new session, so you don't miss a single episode. I'd also greatly appreciate any reviews, likes and shares that you can give me It just helps me extend my reach to more people. So leaders, I know just how frustrating it can feel When you're in the weeds of work, or ministry, and life is chaotic. You're struggling to feel effective, and you're just not enjoying leadership as much as you could be.

And so to help you after many years of leadership and executive coaching, I've developed a framework called the Christian leader blueprint that'll guide you to find clarity in your life and leadership. It'll help you gain a better rhythm of life. It'll help you see yourself more clearly, that'll to leverage your strengths, and you'll produce more productive relationships. It's a step by step guide to leadership transformation. And I have that in 2 formats now.

I have a free short guide that you can find on Ryan franklin dot org and I have a book, the Christian later blueprint. And you can find that in any format including an audiobook book, wherever you buy your books. I have a few more things on my website that you may be interested in, so just head on over to ryan franklin dot org and check it all out. And now, let's get to our session. So today, we have a special guest on the podcast.

The 1 and only Darren Sergeant. And I wanna start by telling you a little bit about darren. And first of all, he's a motivational force, with a unique story. You see Darren was born with just 1 hand. And his life is a testament to seeing the world to a lens of possibilities and not just life limitations.

And in 2008, Darren watched his motivational business, let me give you a hand, and has inspired thousands of people across the globe. He's not just an advocate for overcoming life's hurdles. He's actually a living example of it. And in addition to that, he is also the director of Upc ministry central. He's an evangelist traveling all over the place.

Preaching the word of God. He's a husband to. He has 3 children, and it's not gonna be long. And he's gonna be a grandfather. I don't know what they're gonna call sir.

He will have his first grandchild. Yeah. Darren has... Darren has authored several books, but he has another 1 coming out any day now. It's called Battle the beast.

Defeating the lions that oppose your destiny. And that's exactly what I asked him to come on today to talk about And so, Darren, A let you greet the audience, but also want you to start off just by sharing a little bit about what inspired you to write battle the beast. Well, first of all, I wanna say thank you, Ryan for the opportunity. I appreciate you. You are a leader among leaders.

And, been following you for for a while now. Of course, we've known each other for a few years, but I appreciate everything you're doing your recent book is just a hit. And, everywhere I go, I talked to those about leadership that want to know more. I said this is this is the book. This is the 1.

So you've kinda thank you for that eye when it comes to that. And I appreciate you and you're involvement and your contribution to the work of God. I don't know even when it happened. I preach a message. There's a message I preach.

And I've preached for probably 2 or 3 years now when I feel it. I think all preacher, we have those we have those unique messages that god gives us that We throw out every once a while when we're feeling a little prompting. And in this message, I have a small little blurb about 1 of David's mighty men who went down into a pit with a lion on a on a slippery winter day and defeated something that was under the surface. And I woke up in July of last year. Just 1 early morning, and I'm an early rise, and I was just in my time of devotion, and I feel like the lord just prompted me.

About diving a little deeper into the story of David and his relationship with Saul and his relationship with his mighty men, Mark Patterson wrote a book that we all know in a pit with a lion on a snowy day. But Yeah. He never dealt with. The fact that Bon understood. If I don't take care of this now, while it's beneath the surface where no 1 can see it, it yeah come up 1 day and destroy me or my family or someone walking down this path, so he deals with this beast under the surface in order to eat someone from being destroyed later on.

And so I begin to kinda work on it over than 2 or 3 months span, it just kinda flowed out of me, and the purpose behind is, basically, You know, I'll say this probably a couple times in this interview. We can only fix what we're willing to face. And I somebody... Times when it's under the surface in our lives when no 1 could see it, and we may be the only ones that are aware of it, well we know god's aware of it, but we don't deal with some of those things. And so this book is an attempt to help people recognize that there are things that may be hidden in us.

That want to destroy us, and we've gotta take care of that while we can't. Even while it's beneath the surface. Yeah. Kind of the most of it. And and that's that sounds phenomenal.

So just kinda diving your to your life a little bit, and this is not even 1 of the questions. So... Even prepared for for you. But just kinda diving into your life, tell tell me how, that relates to your to your struggles and even you know, with the with Yep. Just just go into that a little bit.

Well, you've already mentioned. I was born with the with what I consider to be the greatest gift. That I could've have been given us I was born with 1 hand. It it has some challenges. You're not gonna see me do sign language you told get half the message But I I have lived with what many people consider to be limiting or what many people because consider to be a disadvantage, which I feel is probably my greatest disadvantage, but it has also forced me to deal with the insecurities that come with what many call a disability.

I don't call my condition of disability it's really an ability. I've had people try to pray for my arm, try to get it to grow, and I'm, like, stop. You're gonna wreck my ministry, You know, nobody wants a 2 handed preacher. And so I I just I just have come through this understanding that there were things in me that Yeah. Even though God was...

I have incredible parent. My parents are I owe so much of them on the first born of 3 boys, and they they just... Before Nike ever said just do it. That was the motto for Der. My dad would not...

I mean, he did not lend me a hand. He was like, you're going after its son. And so I've raised with that, but I noticed as I became begin into my teenage years and into my twenties, some of these challenges. That we're surfacing from maybe insecurity, maybe not under fully understanding while why I was born the way I was And 1 day, it's a it's a long story with my first grade and my fourth grade teacher. I won't even get into that unless we go there, but My dad introduced me when I was in the first grade, my dad introduced me to a scripture, psalm 01:39, verse 14.

We are fearful and wonderfully made. And Yeah. As I progressed in my understanding, I begin to recognize all of us. None of us were born average. We are all born with promise and potential, but we allow things to hinder us.

From the cradle to the grave. There are things that come into our lives, and I've lived by a very simple statement, Ryan, you'll never make an impact unless you're committed to the collision. And usually the first collision that Pasta is right here. Before I can affect you, I gotta deal with me. And I think sometimes times we flip that and kinda use that as well.

I'm more effective reaching people but we got glaring insecurities or glaring issues. Well, that's that's what, I mean, obviously, you're born without 1 of your hands. Sure. But, a lot of people are born with various deficiencies. I mean, Sure.

You know, I just look at a person's personality you know, I I can go through a person's personality, and I can show you your strengths. But I can also show you your weaknesses, and I think it's important to know our weaknesses. But I I think our insecurities come out of those weaknesses serve those struggles in life. And and what I'm hearing you say is I guess, you didn't say this, but what I'm hearing in the midst of that, is it doesn't matter what your struggle is, you... We're going...

We're going to have those emotional deficiencies. Those emotional, you know, struggles within our within our character, and that's really no matter what the the the root of the struggle is. We've got to overcome those insecurities. Well, and I think so many things, you know, life throws at us that, like you mentioned, you know, I've been privileged to speak now probably close to a million students, young adults in the last 35 plus years of, and only 30 I don't know how that happened. But you're you're a little more gray than I am.

And... I'm in my forties. Careful now. Careful now. And what I recognized is, you may be sitting there in that crowd.

I see this a lot when I go into high schools. And youth functions. They may not have something that's glaring that shows that they have a disability or a handicap, they're dealing with something. There's an inner struggle and an an inner war going on that we have got to attack because God's called us, to effectiveness. God's called us to impact the lives of this generation.

That's our calling. If you're a child to God, if you're a leader in the kingdom of God, God has told you to make a difference, We were not brought into this world, just to sit on the sidelines. Okay? Now I played basketball in Junior high. Okay.

I thought I'd try out basketball. I shoot outside perimeter. I was deadly. But everybody knew which direction I was gonna dr. He's going right.

And so my coach would set me down, and I'd be on the sidelines till we got about 20 or 30 points into the game... Come on, Sa. It's time for you to go, and they would always trap me on that corner. But We have a choice. We can sit back and just let life pass us by, or we can face the things that are trying to oppose our destiny.

And just just exist or we can persist and we can be the person that God is wanting us to be calling this to be, and I learned early on. I'm not going to sit on the sidelines. I'm not gonna sit when I can serve. I'm not gonna just roll over when God can do something with my life. Have there been challenges?

Oh, yeah. But I think God very challenges. Because it's strength it's helped me understand that, you know, truly greater is he that is within us than he that is in the world. So Yeah. God, I...

I'm of the belief that we were all designed to do something. Or designed me specifically to do something you specifically to do something. Yep. But it's it's like we all also have these lions that we're having to face in our journey. Sure.

Could you talk about maybe some of the more common lions that you that you see people facing is their as they're journey through their, you know, trying to do what the lord design it to do? Sure. I think I think the very first 1 and I write about it in the book. The very first 1 that I think we all have to face is the lion of fear. Fear seems to be the foundational predominant spirit but that wants to capture all of us and just lock us in its jaws.

No doubt was coming out and being what God's called us to be, So Deal with fear and in it, I use... And people will argue on that. Fact. They'll think... I'm not fearful.

Darren, I'm not fearful. Yeah. But the reality of it is is lot a lot of times, I know everyone is fearful. But a lot of times, even the ones that that are are saying that they're not, they're they're the most fearful. Well, the thing is, fear is a spirit.

Yeah. And god given us the spirit of fear, but a power and of love of a sound mine. And so fear, I kinda break it down, you we can... And I use it use it in an acronym. I think that's the right linguistic term or language term, you can face everything and run, Mh.

You could face everything and rise. It's your choice. And so with the condition that I was born with with the challenges that I faced. I decided early on that I was gonna face everything and arise. You tell me it can't be done.

I will do everything in my power to prove to you and be done. I took a golf in my in my early twenties because everyone said it's impossible with 1 hand and now all my friends that told me it was impossible. You know, if they beat me, they're not telling nobody. But I beat them, I tell everybody. And I beat them most of the time because I've decided fear is not gonna be my chapter.

It's not gonna limit me. I'm not gonna be I'm not gonna be bound by it. I'm gonna use it for rise above. Its it's it pushes you. I think fear, we wanna we wanna get rid of it.

Don't get rid of it. Turn it. I wanna hear I wanna hear some other lines, but this fear thing is a big thing. So... Big...

Let's talk about it through the lens of fear of failure. I find that that that even sneaks up on people. People don't even realize that they have that, that they're dealing with that, but yet. It's a huge thing. How how have you in your life?

How have you overcome that fear failure in your life? Well, first of all, failure is never final. We've heard that. We've heard that all our lives. Failure is never final.

For me... Each failure in my life. I have done couple of things. Number 1. I've asked god to help me overcome it.

And get through it and forgive me for whatever it was or whatever. But I've also asked I've also asked him to teach me what I need to learn from this failure. So many times we feel regret for our failure, but we don't learn the lesson of the failure. We just wanna quickly put it some place. Think god goes under the blood, thank God God forgive, but we need to take the principles of that failure, and use them to lift us up above because if we don't Paul said, forget those things that are behind and press, you've gotta be moving but you've gotta take those building blocks of failure and use them and we've heard this too as stepping stones to something better and something greater and something you know, I don't want I don't want my failure to be repeated.

I want learn from failure. So that I can look back and say, you know what? You have no you have no hold over me anymore, but boy, I put picked up some marshals from that failure that has sustained me in moving forward. And I think it's so vital for us to focus in what is the lesson of the failure? Yeah.

What's the lesson of this So and so even knowing... Even process through that lens of knowing that there is a a lesson if we do fail, maybe could even alleviate, a little bit of that fear of failure That that's not final. That's not our final destiny. It's not working good we we do to live. Rejoice not against me on my enemy.

From when I fall, I am gonna rise. And, Yeah. I'm gonna do something with it. I'm gonna... And and the benefit of learning failure, learning from failure is that you're helping others.

Mh. You're helping others overcome what they may have to face. And that's the beauty. There's there's so many principles and nuggets that we can pick up, that aren't just for us to to hoard in our little bag and like, we got little tri kits, and we got all this notes. It's the help other people, and that's what we're here for.

That's my motto of for life is I I wanna take the disadvantages that I've been had and handed and turned them into advantages for others. That's good. So what's some other? What's some other common lions that people face? I deal with...

I did with several different lions. I have a whole chapter on the lions, the lions of self. And there so many... Elf lions. And I...

You know, we could go through all of, but I'll just... I'll leave it at that. It it's almost like it's, you know, a lion their grouping is called a pride. And so I kinda tie that in, the lines of self, the lines of self righteousness. I deal with that.

That 1 may get me in trouble, but it's a good chapter, has some good nuggets there. A deal with the lion of apa empathy because I think so many times. That's a good 1. With challenges. We roll over more than we stand up.

And I've watched good people, gifted talented but the minute, a struggle comes, a minute something happens. They just kind of roll over. And there are 5 principles basically that I talk about and how to combat that, and but you'll have to buy the book to get down. So when you... But I wanna dig into that just a little bit because that's it.

That's a powerful concept that... Of apa. So are you saying that sort of when they when they hit a roadblock in in the road, it it's just sort of stalls them out. Like they're, like they they might as well just spill over on the side of the road and stalls Give up. Yeah.

Being born the way that I was has put me in contact with a lot of people that have physical challenges. And it's 1 of the things that I've noticed but I've also noticed it a lot in young people and young adults. Living is basically pathetic living. It's just rolling over, and just saying, you know what? I I...

It's easier to just sit down than it is to stand up and cons be bombarded by the challenges that life bring us. So if somebody struggling with that, Darren, what what is gonna motivate them to get back on the road and and cross through that struggle? I I think the first thing for me is you gotta act. On the fact. Mh.

That you are in the clutches of apa empathy. Recognition understanding is always the first key to overcoming. That's that's good. Have to recognize it. We you know, you...

You'll never know some things unless you you're willing to grow through them. And so first thing is action. You have to act on. You have to You have to recognize. I'm just gonna share a little vulnerability here.

I have a I have a list of daily affirmations. That when I'm in prayer are things that I say. I say them because I know I'm gonna face a challenge in the enemy or whatever is gonna tell me. Just just don't worry about it. And some of those are, you've gotta press through.

God is greater in you than he that is in this world. And so you have to act, but action should always lead us to purpose. And a lot of people that I am privilege to speak to to talk to, they don't recognize their purpose. And the... 1 of the reasons I wrote the this book is to get us to recognize that God has a plan.

God has a purpose for where we are in our journey, and so his you've gotta pursue purpose, and when you pursue purpose, it will always develop into passion. Yeah. Have you have you found have you found that when people have not grabbed hold of their purpose. And and when I say purpose, I mean, understanding their gifts. Yeah.

And understanding their calling. Yeah. And they have not grabbed a hold of those 2 things, It's hard to get motivated to get through hard stuff in it... It it's very difficult because you don't have a reason. Yeah.

And I think all of us need to discover you said it... Earlier all of us are gifted with some calling, something that god wants us to do. Ryan, you're able to reach people that I'll never reach. Earlier You're able to speak into people's lives with your gifting and your talents and you've discovered your purpose. It's put a passion in you to get the voice out to get the word out to get the message out and when we don't discover that, when we don't understand our identity in price, don't understand why he died for us, You know, it's not just the forgive us of our sins.

That's great. And wonderful. And I'm thankful for that. But he put within us, this this calling this purpose. And when that's never discovered or that's pushed away because it may be too challenging to accept it?

The passion is gone and you live in this realm of just existing just going through the motion motions you're affected by everything around you. I don't wanna just be affected by things around. I want to affect things around me. Yeah. I want the 1 that's always affected.

I wanna... You know, I live by a statement, you know, circumstances do not define us. We define our circumstances. This did not define me. I defined it.

I chose say, you know what, this is not gonna keep me. And so I think when you pursue that purpose, it results in that passion. That causes you to rise up and make the difference that God's called you to make. Yeah. And it starts with...

I just wanna go back to what you started that whole, little segment on. Understanding your inner struggles, understanding what your arm not having an arm did to you inner enter inside, not externally, but your internal struggles. And that yeah. That sort of helped you rise above and and move into what was possible for you versus what was impossible for you? I'm I'm a step out here on a very precarious plank.

So you can reach me at if you need, don't don't bother ryan with this, you come to me. We view people, and this is an issue that I've had to overcome. We view people that are different than us as being flawed. Many people, and I love people of faith. I never wanna discourage somebody a faith I will let you pray for my arm, but inside, I'm saying, Lord, if this is your will, that's fine, but I'm good.

But you're yourself? Does... Yeah. Yeah. I'm settled.

I know who I am. God doesn't make a mistake. And so often. We have people that view you know, get myself a trouble. I don't know how much you want me to go here.

I, you know, we're we're dealing your liberty. We're we're doing a lot of autism in our world right now. Children born with autism. And I've had more than 1 person tell me well, we just gotta break that out of them. I believe god can do anything.

I believe God can work miracles. I've seen him work miracles. Yeah. I've had people all my life right. That felt like, I'm lacking because I do not have a hand.

I'm I'm what God created. And I'm okay with that. And so I think we have to go back to that inner struggle. I had to find my purpose. And I had to find my identity and I had to recognize something.

I'm truthfully wonderfully made. Dante make a mistake with me, I'm okay. I'm alright. Yeah. Thank you for your kindness and your concern, but This is this is my gift.

And so when we when we get settled, that was the right word to use, Ryan. When we get settled, in our understanding of who we are. No weapon form begins me to prosper because it's powerful. I know who god called me to be. And I am not gonna let your opinion.

I'm not gonna let your outlook on the fact that all poor, I have people that feel so sorry for me. Don't don't don't. Let's get on the golf course. I'll show you how sorry you will be. A bi.

Well, I don't like golf, so we're good there. Yeah. Yeah. The new thing is pickle a ball, and III, you know, doesn't take 2 hands but pickle ball, but I got a bad knee right now, so I can't play, but I'm a pick it up on these days. Well, when your knee gets better, we'll play a game of racket ball.

How about that? Well, I grew a playing ra ball. That's that's my sport. That's my sport. And Yeah.

I've got got gotta get my e fixed. So then we'll play. So before we continue on with the podcast, this episode is brought to you by Christian leader. Community coaching. Are you a Christian leader who is overwhelmed by the complexity of trying to figure out how to grow your team, I wanna introduce to you our Christian leader community coaching program.

We have an easy to use online platform that has a full archive of courses supportive community, live group coaching, and elements that are customizable specifically for your team. And I've personally seen the quick and enormous impact that it can have on a team of leaders who are focused together on learning and mastering the skills needed to grow their leadership effectiveness and enjoyment. And we wanna be a part of that with you We wanna help you create and implement a plan. The community is very much affordable, but I would say that you can't afford not. To have focused growth within your team.

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So I know that there is, there's other lions, but we're gonna keep moving for sake of time. I wanna ask you, relationships are vital in our life. And Yeah. I'd I'd love for you to talk about the role of relationships, like David, with saul and Samuel, but talk about the role relationships and navigating and overcoming those challenges. Absolutely.

I I believe and and I have certain life statements that I write down in every journal I have and in a lot of my bibles, and 1 of them is this. Life moves at the speed of relationships. And I think when you look at the relationship that David had with saul, saul, was an insecure leader. Saul couldn't get his mess figured out, and it it caused him. Yeah.

Always we need to always be careful of those leaders that keep a ja close at hand. That want to throw it at somebody who is equipped and called, insecure leaders will live with Ja next to them. They'll live with spears next to them. And what I've noticed in the life of David, David had a security about him that saul did not have. And that security, Was developed in the field when he is facing the lion, and he is facing the bear.

Think about it I mean, everyone around David did not think he was worth anything. The prophet comes to have a special sacrifice because God tells him to go to the house of Jesse, anointed 1 of his sons, and we know the story. He sees the first born, it's like, ugh, the 1. Look at that, man. He's be buff like Ryan Franklin.

I mean. Look at that guy. He's unbelievable. This is gotta be him. And God says don't look on the outward, man.

It's I don't see the outward. I see the inward man. I see the strength that's inside. He goes down the whole line. And no doubt, Samuel was a little frustrated like, okay.

I've... None of them. I... Did I missed the turn? Is there another Jesse?

Family in this in this area that I miss it? And so he asked, is there another son? Oh, well, yeah. But he's he just tense cheap. Dismissed, forgotten overlooked, David is living under these stigma.

We see it again, after he's anointed and he goes to bring, you know, bread and cheese to his brothers on the battlefield. He starts asking questions. Who's what what's gonna... You what kind of money? What kind of perks am I gonna give if I take down this giant and his brother.

Pulls them aside and says I know the na of your heart. You're nothing but up Pip. What did you do? Check out the verse, what did you do with those few sheep? You left back at daddy's house.

It's just this constant. Constant. Just they're just be brad him. And finally, we know the story. He's stand before Saul.

Saul is trying to put armor on them. But, you're not equipped. And he's like, you know, you don't understand. My god helped me. I conquered a lion in a bear for this moment.

And this is the point of what I'm trying to drive home. Some things that we conquered now, you've got a deal with some things in your twenties, so they don't destroy you in your thirties. You gotta. Deal was some things in your forties, so they don't come and destroy your marriage in and your family in your fifties and sixties. We wanna to stretch things off and thrown it under the rug and and doing all this and God saying, let me give you an example of David.

David took care of some things. And when Goliath fell I mean, it was just like, oh, okay. Somebody has conquered some inner struggles. To get to this place. And from that, we see it, like, a meteor york rise for David, but it drives some nuts.

It's just eats at him because he cannot handle someone who is so secure in himself. Saw had s head security problems from the very beginning. Yeah. I mean, his calling was all about insecurity. Yeah.

I mean, he's hiding and and and he's he's samuel. Samuel feels like, God why in the world did you let the people pick this 1? But finally, God found a man. That was after his own heart. And it was David Perfect?

Yeah. You have failures? No. But he picked up like we talked about and he became better because of it. And that's the that's the push and the impetus of this book is to is to understand that we are called to do things, but we better deal with some things.

I can only correct what I'm willing to confront. And when we confront it, it's gonna come back at some point, if you're going to be effective in the kingdom of god, you, gotta deal with your stuff. And would you would you say that not everything, but the majority of our stuff comes in the midst of relationships, like our ability to, to interact relational with people around us. Absolutely. And, you know, there's some people that...

There's some that we there's some people that are gonna be not for us. And you know, we we need to be polite to them and and Yeah. Brother and Christian to them. However, there's others in our life that are gonna be for us. And and really provide the things in our life necessary to move through those challenges in life.

Would you agree? I, absolutely. My wife has a... You know, we we pastor her for several years in a couple different churches, and my wife called those challenging people grace builders. They're aaron in our lives to to the friction friction.

A great a great name for him. Builders Yeah. Grace builders. My wife, you know, she said, god allows them. They...

They're in our life. They're there for a reason. And you know, those same people at times because their grace builders can also provide truth to us, Very thin grace. He reveals things in our nature. We...

My wife and Our privileged right now. We're doing a lot of marriage conferences. And 1 of the things that I bring out is God uses your spouse to develop your character. Because God's intent for our marriages is not to make us happy. We think we want a happy marriage his intent is to make us holy.

So he put he puts your spouse in your life sometimes to kinda be that grace builder. This is, you know what? We we want comfort. God's, god's role in our life and using other people, not to make us comfortable. He's trying to develop character He's trying Shape us and relationships are so key.

And so when I dive into the relationship in this book with Saul, I also dive into the relationship with David, and his role with this those mighty men. They came to him. The the scripture says they were distressed discontent in debt, they're mis fits from society. They're all messed up. They have no they have no family support.

They're just a mess. But something happens in their relationship with David. That developed them and men that would take on 600 minute at 1 time. I mean, for a guy who go down into a pit, to defeat a lion to the same guy who take on 2 lion like Men moa app. I I don't know what that means, but they had to be ugly.

I I mean, it it just... He takes an egyptian. Takes the spear out of the egyptian. That can happen overnight. That was the development of a relationship.

With a man who was securing who he was and what god had called him to do. Yeah. I love that. Well, yes, sir. I'm a I'm a practical guy.

I love practical. Strategies steps. Why don't you give us some practical strategies or tools, even that you may talk about in the book or or even maybe something beyond the book, but that would help would help people overcome their personal alliance and actually strive to pursue their God given destiny. The first thing I would say is never be afraid to stretch. The enemy wants us to remain in our comfort zones.

Because our comfort zone is a domain where we're not effective. Never stretch. Stretch and stretch. Though. It it hurts.

It hurts. I've... I've been over for something the other day in my my ham stretch. And I was like, oh, dear God. That's hasn't been stretched in a while.

I need to work on that. It hurts. It's uncomfortable. It's not pleasant, but we never. And should be afraid to stretch because God seems to meet us on the other side of our comfort I I don't even know how to put that in articulate the way that I feel it right now, but God always meets us on the other side of our our comfort zone.

And so I think we have to we have to stretch and we've got to be willing to allow others into our lives that will help us get there. Let me give you a big 1. That's a big 1. David is committed soon. He's he's slept with Ba.

He's killed Uri. He's a year into this journey, close to it, and, Nathan the profit shows up. And he tells him parable, talks about this land that someone stole, and David's irate. I'm gonna take care of that. And Nathan looked at him stuck his finger in his face and you're the man, David.

You better have someone in your life. That can put their finger in your face and say you. Yeah. David aloud. That man, I know he was a prophet.

I know he was a great man, but David gave him access to his life. We all need people to help us. Because we... Sometimes I don't see the issues in my heart Sometimes sometimes friends see things different than I see it. And I need someone.

Say, hey, dude. You're you're walking down or you... That's not the way to look at it. That's not the direction to go. That's not what to say.

Yeah. I have to be willing to accept that and say you know you're right, and David did, David had a heart and he accepted it. And in in psalm 51 is that created me a clean heart guy, Renewing me a right spirit. They'll take your spirit from me. And though the the baby was was lost and did not make it in birth, David picked himself up, You see this even when he he's before he's ever on the throne, you see it in lag when everything's stolen and everything's burned, how he reacts the men were picking up stones.

These men that he developed. Were picking up stones to to stone him, but the bible says he encouraged himself, in the Lord and he led. And I think so often, we need those people around this that'll say, nope No. Not only God, but others. So true.

So true. I was on a call just before you and I jumped on this interview. Meeting with 1 of my support team members. I... I've got a team of people around me that I would consider my support team members, and I was unpacking something that I that was a little challenging for me, and he identified something that I never saw.

In in the mix of it. He provides lots of grace. He provides lots of grace for me. He provided truth in that moment that I needed to hear. Yeah.

And that's life changing there and that's... That is just life changing for me. And are are allowing those type of people. I don't want... To surround my life with people did just tell me yes, and you're fine and you're good.

Exactly. But, you know what your attitude stinks Sergeant. Yeah? You you need to change your perspective. I want that type of relationships and I've done the same.

I've built friendships into my life that they have complete access. They can ask me any question. I've given them questions. They've created questions that they can ask about different times of my life, and I've told them, when you feel it, ask, I could lie absolutely. But I'm not gonna get any better.

So I want that. I want people... I want god's spirit to be that that prodding... Thing that keeps... I grew up on a farm and idaho, and we take those cows and move them around and prod them and it'll prodding is not comfortable, but boy gives direction.

And I want that. I want that from God. I'm want from for Absolutely. So you may have already answered this question. But, just to reiterate it or if or you may have some additional advice.

Mh. What what would you... What advice would you give? You've got somebody that's listen to this podcast right now that phil completely overwhelmed by the obstacles in their path that's... They feel the lord's leading them down this path Should they feel they have a roadblock that is just enormous and they can't get they can't get through it.

What advice would you give that person in this moment? I would go back to... I'd go back to what we just talked about. Never face, never face a struggle a little alone. Yeah.

Bring someone into your corner. Some of that believes in you, someone that will speak truth to you not just give you what you wanna hear. So make sure that's... Of course, you're gonna go to God, you're gonna go to God and ask him to help you navigate this, but use the word of god. There are so many examples in Gods.

Word where God led people in the midst of struggle. So true recognize that it's not the end. Because you're facing a roadblock. It's not the end. Fact probably is just the beginning to something that's going to be absolutely amazing.

In your life. I had to I had to face some of my challenges. I had to overcome the fear of being misunderstood. I had to overcome the fear of a pay. I'm not gonna be able to to do it as good as somebody else but god didn't call me to do it as good as somebody else.

God told me to do it the way he created me and crafted me, and I've gotta take confidence. In his calling in my life. I've gotta take confidence that he has called he that have begun a good work will complete it he will complete it. He's the author finish. He's the beginning and the end.

He's not just somebody to set you out on a boat and you're just... You're just you know, float out and all the elements and all the storm and all the waves are dirt. No. He's got a plant, and you have to rest in that. And don't don't ever give up.

You know how many times I've felt, like, this isn't worth it. It's too difficult. Don't give up. Keep pressing. Keep pushing.

Yeah. Keep moving. I I have a statement that another life statement attitude determines direction, and direction is more important than speed. I had to learn to adjust my. It doesn't matter how fast or slow the race has not given to the swift.

It's given to the 1 that endure. And if you're attitude that's powerful. You'll eventually get there. It may take you longer. It may take me longer than Ryan Franklin to figure some things out in my life.

But if my app do right, I'm gonna get there an attitude has in my opinion 1 of the biggest things and maybe maybe this will be my final point. I don't know, But my biggest thing is attitude. I could've have looked at my challenge as, you know what? Can't do nothing. You're you're, you know, you're shorthand handed.

You know, he can't shuffle a deck of cards, can't pick your nose and talk on cell phone at the same time, you know, whatever. Can't join the swim team. You swim in circles. You. I could had all...

Got. I've got a list of them. If we we could be here for another 30 minutes Ryan. I got a list. I could've have, but my attitude says, Why not?

Yeah. Try it. Was a not Kennedy that some people look at challenges and say, they can't... I look at challenges say, I can or... Or...

I'm I'm butcher butchering it, but Robert F Kennedy, he had a great quote. About, you know, overcoming those things. Why not? Why not try it? Why not be for.

Like why not? So Hey. Well, Darren, this has been a fantastic conversation, and I I just wanna thank you so much for giving us your time today. If people wanna connect with you in some way, I want you to tell us that, and then also, you're you got a book coming out, battle battle the beast, sounds like it's gonna be a phenomenal book. I can't wait give my hands on it.

But where can where can people buy you online and then where can they pre purchase this book? Sure. It's we're showing the process of the final edits and layout is fact that. I've got someone who's been reaching out to me while we've been on this. On this interview wanting to talk to me about some of the final layout edits.

So we're looking at the end of March first of April, when it be released, it'll be released on Amazon as well as Ben Publishing house. You'll go there. But you can follow me. I'll be I'll be launching you know, before that, talking about where you can get it on Instagram at appearance sergeant. You can follow me there, Facebook.

Of course, and Okay. Those 2 places will probably the social accounts that I will use to... I haven't got to tick tiktok that much yet, you know, I haven't got my fancy yet down yet. So probably not gonna go there, but, Instagram and Facebook will be the primary things. So you can go to darren sergeant dot com.

We'll have it available there as well. Okay. Excellent. Well, I'll put those links in, the show notes, links to your... Social media and your website.

I appreciate. So again, Darren, thank you so much for being. I thank you. I so enjoyed this. Appreciate you much.

So this concludes our show today. My name is Ryan Franklin. Thank you so much for joining us on the Christian leader made simple podcast. So before we continue on with the podcast, this episode is brought to you by Christian leader, community coaching. Are you a Christian leader who is overwhelmed by the complexity of trying to figure out how to grow your team?

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