Pastors, This Christmas I'm Politely Begging You to Do This

Ryan Franklin
12 minutes ago
7 min read

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This brief Christmas episode is a heartfelt conversation with pastors and ministry leaders about navigating one of the busiest seasons of the year. Ryan shares simple, practical ways to rest well, handle relational tension with grace and truth, and enter the new year with renewed clarity. A short, honest reminder that you don’t have to carry December alone, and that God is far nearer than you sometimes feel.

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Transcript

Pastors, this Christmas season, I'm begging you to do this, and let me tell you exactly what this is. Here it is.

Welcome to the Christian Leader Made Simple podcast. I really hope this episode helps you learn and master the skills you need to grow your leadership, effectiveness, and enjoyment. Be sure to hit the subscribe button to get notified as soon as I post a new session so you don't miss a single episode. I'd also greatly appreciate any reviews, likes, and shares that you can give me. It just helps extend my reach to more people.

So leaders, I know just how frustrating it can feel when you're in the weeds of work or ministry and life is chaotic. You're struggling to feel effective and you're just not enjoying leadership as much as you could be. And so to help you, after many years of leadership and executive coaching, I've developed a framework called the Christian Leader Blueprint that'll guide you to find clarity in your life and leadership. It'll help you gain a better rhythm of life, it'll help you see yourself more clearly to leverage your strengths, and you'll produce more productive relationships.

It's a step-by-step guide to leadership transformation and I have that in two formats now. I have a free short guide that you can find on ryanfranklin.org and I have a book, the Christian Leader Blueprint, and you can find that in any format, including an audiobook, wherever you buy your books. I have a few more things on my website that you may be interested in, so just head on over to ryanfranklin.org and check it all out.

And now let's get to our session.

Welcome to the Christian Leader Made Simple Show. I'm Ryan Franklin, and today I just want to talk straight to my fellow pastors and ministers and church leaders because you know what? Christmas hits different for us. Everybody else is sort of slowing down and many times we're just gearing up for that next service or program or family expectations, the extra pastoral counseling that may come around during this time, the last-minute emergencies in people's lives.

And so the title of this episode is Pretty Bold for a Reason. Pastors, this Christmas season I'm begging you to do this. And let me tell you exactly what this is: here it is — slow down, rest, and let God recalibrate your relationships and your pace before you walk into a brand new year.

And I'm not talking about a long sabbatical or disappearing for three weeks. I'm talking more about the kind of rest that reaches deep into your soul — the kind that reminds you that you are a child of God before you're a pastor or a leader of a church.

Christmas is a tremendous season of the year. I love Christmas, and it's a draining one. And if you're not careful, you're going to find yourself preaching and teaching about peace while internally you're just begging God for your own sense of peace.

So I want to break down a few simple and doable tips for you.

The first one is to rest. One of the most powerful things that Jesus ever modeled wasn't just healing or teaching — that's all important — but one of the most powerful things he modeled that we don't talk about a lot was the fact that he withdrew. He pulled away at times to rest, to find solitude, to create margin.

Scripture tells us that he often departed into a solitary place and there prayed not because he was weak but because he was wise.

So let me ask you a simple question here: What's a small pocket of rest that you can take this week—this week—and without guilt that would make the biggest difference in your life?

Now, I'm not talking about sleeping in an extra hour (which obviously doesn't hurt people from time to time). I'm talking about lowering the volume on all of the noise around you to hear your own thoughts again. You're wanting to let God breathe into places that maybe you've been holding tight.

And I'm talking about turning off the leadership switch long enough so that you can remember that you're loved for who you are—not for what you do or what you produce.

I want to give you two practical ways to do that.

The first one is: create a few opportunities to have a 30-minute pocket of stillness this week. Now, I know that doesn't sound like a lot but hey, how often do you do that? So put your phone away somewhere else—another room maybe—and just sit and breathe and pray without an agenda and sort of let God untangle your mind a little bit.

The second practical tip for rest is: take one expectation off your December plate. I challenge you to do this. Not everything you're doing is mission critical; give yourself permission to release the thing that nobody will actually miss—probably—or release what could maybe be set aside until after the new year.

Maybe it's something that you just need to release—that you don't have to do in the season—maybe it's releasing an emotional expectation of yourself or someone else—or maybe it's just saying no to someone or something.

No is not a bad word. Sometimes just letting go of one little tiny thing can create the margin that your internal being has been begging for.

Now I need you to hear me here: Rest is not a luxury. Rest is actually obedience. Rest is stewarding one of the Lord's greatest assets. And rest is one of the most spiritual things that you can give yourself during this Christmas season as we're reflecting on what this season is all about.

All right, one more thing I want to address in this short segment—I’m not going to be with you long here—but I want to address one more thing that can help you eliminate some relational stress this Christmas: navigating conflict with grace and truth.

You know pastors and leaders don't get a pass on conflict; we all have conflict. And if your family is similar to mine then family tension—even—it doesn't just magically disappear because you wear a title; if anything it actually increases the pressure.

There's history with your family; there's expectations; there may even be some old wounds that resurface every time you get together for the holidays like Christmas dinner.

So let me set you free with something simple here: Think about this—you are not responsible for fixing every relationship in your family—especially in one day—and here's your responsibility: Your responsibility is just to show up with grace and truth and let the outcome be in God's hands.

And here's what grace says: Grace says "I love you; I'm here for you; I'm patient with you—doing my best to be patient with you." And then truth says: "I'm not ignoring reality; I'm choosing to walk in it with health."

So if you're feeling that old tension sort of rising in your chest when you think of certain conversations or certain people—I want you just pause—I want you slow down your reaction—check your heart—check your motives—and ask yourself this:

How can I show grace here without abandoning truth?

And then another question:

How can I communicate truth without abandoning grace?

Let me give you two quick tips that will help—they help me in these situations—I hope they will help you as well.

The first one: Prepare your spirit before entering the room. Jesus said blessed are the peacemakers—that wasn't a command to fix everything; it was more of a posture—and so you can walk into a room as a peacemaker even if no one else cooperates and everybody else chooses chaos—you can walk in as a peacemaker.

The second thing: Set gentle boundaries when needed—that is: You can excuse yourself from heated moments without guilt; redirect conversations; choose not to take bait somebody's feeding—you set boundaries.

Boundaries are not unloving; boundaries are actually loving—you can't love properly without boundaries—they're actually how we protect the version of ourselves God is shaping—and really how we eventually love deeper—boundaries are not bad words.

Grace and truth—they’re not opposites—they’re partners—and you'll need both walking through these Christmas holidays with peace.

Okay—as I wrap up here—I want mention quickly about vision and planning:

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If you'd like try it out—you can find it on Amazon by searching Christian Leader Site Planner—or check out more info at ryanfranklin.org

One final word—to pastors/leaders heading into Christmas—if you've listened this far—let me speak straight:

You don’t have carry December alone by strength—you don’t have fix every heart—you don’t have hold every crisis—you don’t have meet every expectation

Your calling’s real—but so’s humanity—and God who came wrapped flesh understands both

So take pressure down notch this Christmas

Rest mind body

Lean into relationships matter most

Let God refill places running low on

Trust you'll finish year strong through Christ—not pushing harder—but staying closer Him

Pastor leader minister—I hope very merry Christmas

You're likely doing much better than think

God’s far nearer closer than sometimes feel